Okay - a new day

Right - I have been in a bit of a hole recently and just couldn't find a way out of it. Money problems hit a head last week and things were down right depressing. The hole of being deep in debt seems never ending - living almost hand to mouth to make sure that bills are paid and then getting hit by bank charges whenever I miscalculated and went overdrawn. Then having to find a way to pay the bank charges whilst not getting overdrawn again. I was just reacting to the money thing and this left no time to think about other things.

But you can make a choice, in fact you have to make a choice. Do you want your life to be ruled by things and you just react to them or even worse just cling on as best you can? Or do you choose to be active and change the situation that you are in?

The former is in someways safer - you know what to expect and although things might be very bad you know how to manage, you coping mechanism click in. You might not actually be able to get out of the badness but you can kid yourself that you are content there. The latter is harder (well life isn't always easy) as you have to start making decisions and these might have some scary consequences. The comfort zone of humdrum life can be removed and then a whole series of options that you might not have thought about suddenly rear their little heads.

I have chosen to be more active in the way that I deal with my life and not just ignore the bad bits. So I have started listing stuff on ebay again (check out my stuff) and I have opened two on-line shops: one selling my extensive collection of vintage knitting patterns and one selling on the postcards that I have bought over the years to sell. I don't know how successful these ventures with be but . At the moment they exist in name only but I will add more to them over the coming weeks.

My plan is to be totally debt free by August 2011 - I might be able to get there earlier but I know what a slacker I can be and don't want to make a promise I can't keep. By then I shall be 42 - and hopefully the Answer to Life, the Universe and Everything will make itself clear. Or I shall be ready to start on my next phase which is to build my own beautiful house. Up until that point I am going to try and live simply - not splurge my cash; take my time with life; enjoy the pleasures it brings; knit in a relaxed manner; feel the pulse of life; make insane plans; and most importantly love.